Two Life-Changing Words
When I was four years old I came home from Sunday School with a paper crown I had made in arts & crafts time. I wore that crown around the house with haughty piety demanding my stuffed animals to remain loyal subjects and bow at my feet. My mom, being the amazing Christian lady that she is, saw an opportunity to share Jesus with me and said, “Do you know that some day you could get a real crown?” My eyes swelled with wonder. “How?” I questioned.
Then time warped to slow motion as she leaned over to me and said, “Everyone who asks Jesus into their hearts gets a real crown when they get to heaven. Do you want one?”
I quickly replied, “I Do.” And my mom led me in the Sinner’s Prayer. My life was never the same.
That day is frozen in my memory and I can recall every detail even 30 years later. Two words “I Do” opened the door for Christ to radically change my life’s direction and my hearts desires. His will for my life has been at the forefront of every choice and every step all of these years, and I’ve felt His Spirit guiding me and giving me peace along the way.
I felt that same peace when I stood at the alter next to my fiancée and again said, “I Do.”
This time these two little words would seal our marriage vows in front of friends, family and our pastor. We had dated for two years and knew that we were soul mates. There was no doubt in my heart that she was to be my wife. We had all sorts of amazing things in common like our faith in God, music, sports, goofy jokes, compassion for people, and an adventurous spirit. Combine all of these with our passionate love for each other and marriage was a natural decision.
There’s one other thing we have in common though that could have been our total demise. We are both women. According to most in our chosen religion, Christianity, our marriage is sinful and unaccepted in God’s eyes. According to our home state of Texas our marriage is non-existent and our marriage certificate, though we were legally married in Iowa (a state that does recognize same-sex marriages), is null and void.
These religious restrictions and government rules could have easily detoured us from having our ceremony, or even staying together as a couple.
As we prayed for God’s plan to be revealed. I kept coming back to one question – “Do you believe God created her for you?” To which I wholeheartedly answered, “I Do.”
We’ve been married for just about three years now and life as a Christian Lesbian couple in the South isn’t the easiest. We’ve struggled to find a home church where we would be accepted together. We have struggled to overcome prejudice outside the church too in our workplaces. It has been a battle to have our family members view us as Christian women still.
However challenging these obstacles have been, they seem to only add fuel to our stubbornness of staying committed to each other. Don’t get me wrong – these trials have been tough to overcome. We’ve got emotional scars and deep wounds that are still in the process of healing, but one thing remains constant in the center of our marriage, which has held us together—that is Christ.
I am sure we sound like a total anomaly—Christian Lesbians who are married. But we identify first and foremost as Christian before any other labels. Our marriage would be nothing with God’s grace, goodness and glue!
The same faith I had as a four-year-old little girl praying for Christ to come into my life is the same faith I have when I hold my wife.
Because if you believe that God is love then this love between two human beings is a God-thang! (That’s how we’d say it in Texas.)
Christian folks have asked me, “Do you believe Christ sees you as married?” To which I reply, “I Do.” Gay folks have questioned, “How can you love a God that so many say will send you to hell?” I simply answer, “I Just Do.”